When One Is Ready For Kindergarten

February 28, 2011 by  
Filed under General

Having twins and being new parents has been an interesting ride thus far.  Both of our boys have two completely different personalities, they play differently with the same toys, and they both learn at a relatively different rate.   The only thing that they are the same for, is their clothes and shoe size.

Both me and my husband have sort of reached a dilemma, and one we have ultimately made a decision on for the time being.  One of our boys is clearly ready for kindergarten, and we can see that he gets bored easily with a lot of things that his brother is still interested in or hasn’t mastered yet.  Our one lil monkey learns at lightening speed (like his dad in a lot of ways), he masters things and moves on relatively quickly, our other monkey just isn’t quite there yet but is right on task for a four year old, but he really has to focus on things (there is nothing wrong with this and that’s how I was as a kid).

Both of them turn 5, like 2 months before the school year starts, so they would be considered a very early 5 and being boys, really lack a lot of maturity as far as sitting still, and really being in a structured environment, I think.  They are both relatively good mannered, but I see some indicators that they just aren’t ready.  It was a hard decision to make, because I know that one of them is ready and the other isn’t, and you cannot just hold one back and send the other when you have twins.  Both my husband and I, have slowly begun to devote individual time to both of them, and that has been helping.

So, now I have been looking for ways to kind of bring them to the same page, to where the one doesn’t get bored and still gains information that peaks his curiosity and eagerness to learn and at the same time brings my other lil guy to where he needs to be in the areas he is struggling with.  I never realized how hard having twins would be and all the things you have to really think about and adjust for one kid over the other.  I never like to compare them, and I encourage them both the same, and I definitely would never want one to feel inferior in any way to the other.  I hear about siblings and rivalry and competition and I am praying for very little of that.

It is hard, because the only thing I want for them is to be happy and succeed in the things that they do.  I think that is what all parents wish for.

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9 Responses to “When One Is Ready For Kindergarten”
  1. lisa says:

    my boys are twins but 13 months apart and even at 7 and 8 the gap in their desires and maturity is more than the 13 months. the one that was behind has caught up and is at the top of his class but his drive is still nothing compared to his brothers. he’s fine doing the bare minimum to get by and can spend all day loafing and will seemingly never be bored in class. the other is reading at a high school level and wants to really learn and know everything. he bores easily and has a serious competative edge. I think that it’s likely that these differences will never change. So I”ve stopped trying to bridge the gap and refocused on finding the things that do get my middle son fired up. He needs to have himself set apart from his brother. He decided he wanted to play a sport that was only his and he loves it. It’s hard to not want to try and make them the same and I realize its different with twins but I think we best serve them when we help them be who they are.

  2. Nolie says:

    You never know and they may surprise you. Little Man has flourished since we put him in a kindergarten readiness program.

  3. all kids learn at different rates and you should not be hard on your self for that. He’s bound to catch up and being an individual is what it’s all about. As long as he’s happy he’ll always have a big brother so to speak to help guide him along the way.
    My little guy starts kindergarten this yr too

  4. Tammy says:

    We actually have a friend that has twin daughters in the exact situation that you are now a couple of years ago. She made a hard decision and indeed sent one of the girls to kindergarten and left the other in pre-school. It actually made a world of difference to the one that waited, without her twin with her, she flourished.

    I don’t know what I would do if I were in your situation though, it must be a very tough decision to make.

  5. I’ve been going through the struggle of deciding whether to send my son next year as well. I can imagine how it would complicate things with twins! Good luck!

  6. Nicky says:

    I don’t have the experience with Twins, but I do have 4 kids that I’ve had the experience of putting all 4 into Kindergarden!

    While I thought my first was more than ready I was slapped in the face with reality! LOL
    But with that, he did just fine, as did my second ….now if I had known better, I would of kept my 3rd child back one more year! He was a very sick little baby with 7 pnemonia’s in his first year (We spent lots of time in hospital thats for sure) And now he is in grade 5 working at a grade 3 and 4 level! Sad thing is they don’t “fail” kids anymore……they dont’ want to hurt them socially! So yes, I would of kept him back an other year had I known that!
    My 4th has reading issues, but is doing well!

    I wish you luck :)


  7. With twins, I would have delayed, too.

  8. Tammy says:

    The first day was hard on me for both of my kids.

  9. Marcie W. says:

    I don’t have twin experience but I am on the other side of this spectrum. My daughter was VERY ready by the time she was 4, yet, due to her birthday, had to wait until the next year. Now she’s 5, in half day Kindergarten (how they do it here in Las Vegas) and is bored because she’s working at a 1st grade level :/

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